Navigating Holiday Emotions: Finding Grounding During a Tender Season

By Nancy Belknap, Clinical Counselor

If you find yourself struggling during the holidays, you are not alone. In my therapy practice, this season often brings up tender conversations about grief, loneliness, overwhelm, or simply feeling “out of sync” with the expectations around us.

The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of celebration, warmth, and togetherness. But for many, this time of year brings a very different emotional experience. Shorter days, colder weather, shifting family dynamics, seasonal depression, and financial stress can all create a complicated mix of feelings.

The Emotional Weight of Shorter Days

As the daylight fades earlier, many people feel a noticeable drop in energy and mood. This is a natural response because our nervous system is deeply connected to light, rhythm, and seasonal patterns. For some, this shift can deepen into Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) or a general heaviness that feels difficult to shake.

Responses such as less motivation, lower mood, increased fatigue, difficulty concentrating and a desire to withdraw are all very normal and not personal failures. They are biological cues that your body is adjusting to the season. Gentle routines, movement, connection, and intentional light exposure can help support your emotional balance.

Navigating Family Dynamics

Even loving families can become sources of stress during the holidays. Old roles, expectations, boundaries, or unresolved tensions often resurface. You might feel pulled in different directions, overwhelmed by obligations, or anxious about being around certain family members.

In therapy, we often explore:

• Setting gentle boundaries
  
  
• Preparing for triggering interactions
  
  
• Creating exits or pauses when you need space
  
  
• Managing guilt when you choose differently
  
  

You’re allowed to protect your emotional well-being even during a season that emphasizes togetherness.

Memories and Expectations

The holidays can also stir grief. Grief for loved ones no longer with us, for relationships that have changed, or for traditions that no longer feel the same. Many people feel pressure to be cheerful or to “keep it together” around the holidays, even when their hearts feel heavy.

If this is you, it’s okay to soften your expectations. You don’t have to perform joy. You don’t have to meet anyone else’s idea of what the holidays “should” look like. Your emotional experience matters exactly as it is.

Creating Space for Yourself

This season often comes with extra noise, such as social expectations, events, family gatherings, shopping, and planning. But your inner experience deserves time and attention. Some grounding practices that can help:

• Spending a few minutes each day in quiet reflection
  
  
• Practicing mindful breathing or gentle movement
  
  
• Allowing yourself breaks from stimulation
  
  
• Engaging in traditions that feel meaningful, while releasing those that don’t
  
  
• Reaching out for connection when you feel isolated
  
  

You Don’t Have to Navigate the Season Alone

If the holidays feel overwhelming, therapy can provide a grounding space to slow down, explore what’s arising, and develop supportive tools for the weeks ahead. Together, we can create a plan that honors both your needs and your capacity.

— Nancy Belknap, Clinical Counselor
 Walking with you through addiction, trauma, healing, and hope.